One of the most important things my mother wanted to instill in my brothers, sisters and I, was to always tell the truth, no matter what it is.
She promised us if we told the truth we wouldn’t get into trouble. She said that telling a lie was worse than anything wrong we could possibly do. We believed her. When we did something wrong, our conscience would bother us and we went to her with the truth and promptly got yelled at and punished. When we protested that we told the truth so as not to get in trouble, she would answer “This is nothing compared to what I would have done had you lied.” Consequently, since we didn’t know how bad it could get, we still told the truth and took our punishments.
Of course children don’t really understand how telling the truth is not just about being honest and forthcoming and owning your mistakes. They won’t fully understand how telling the truth builds trust in your relationships till years later. It’s hard to get that concept across at an early age. Lord knows, we want to be able to trust our children because they aren’t always going to be in our care 24/7. At some point they will go off to school and interact with others and things will happen. You want to be able to believe your child and trust that what they tell you is in fact the truth. It’s very hard to defend a child that is prone to lying, or to trust them to do the right thing. I think it was very wise of my mother to make telling the truth an important issue in our family, and it was a value we learned before setting foot in school.
I have met and gotten to know many different people. I appreciate those who are straight shooters and tell the truth no matter what it might be. I feel like I can trust them and have confidence that if I ask them their opinion I am going to get the truth. Some people like to go around the bush before getting to the truth. I really never cared for that approach. Maybe they are trying to be tactful or sensitive, but sometimes their message is lost or watered down in all their finesse. I prefer that they deliver their message bluntly rather than tip toe around it trying to make it sound better. Others are just liars or they exaggerate the truth until it is unrecognizable. I don’t tolerate lies well. I would never trust someone who makes a habit out of lying or twisting the truth. They are being dishonest and untrustworthy and you really can never believe anything they have to say, so why bother continuing a relationship with them?
Another thing about telling the truth to someone is to consider your intentions. I always feel that if my intentions are good, then the person needs to know. I would feel terrible if I withheld information and something bad were to happen. I would feel responsible. I would rather the person were angry with me for telling them the truth, than for something bad to happen because they didn’t have all the information to consider. That is the personal rule I have use and so far no one has gotten angry with me.
The main thing I live by is “the truth always comes out.” It doesn’t even make sense to lie in the first place. You not only have to keep track of your lies and have a good memory, but in the end the truth will always reveal itself.
The Top Ten Reasons for Telling the Truth,
the Whole Truth and Nothing but the Truth
…No Matter What!
Truth comes from the heart and it takes patience and practice to develop the skill of delivering the truth with grace. However, the truth is not useful if it is not constructive. Telling the truth from a place of love gives you the ability to be unconditionally constructive and honorable.
It is essential to be truthful to ourselves. When you set the standard to always tell the truth you easily gain the trusts of others and yourself. The stronger your personal foundation the easier it will be to tell the truth. It is very important to make sure that it is safe for you to tell the truth.
Here are some tips on why you would want to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth no matter what!
- Being true to yourself and true to those around you will make your life a whole lot easier.
- The sooner you tell the truth the easier it is.
- The longer we hold back the truth, the harder it is on others and ourselves.
- When we tell the truth our relationships grow stronger and richer. When we hold back the truth our relationships suffer including our relationship with ourselves.
- Telling the truth creates freedom and lightness. Holding back the truth creates excess baggage. The more we hold back the more baggage we have.
- When we tell the truth we are blessed with intimacy. When we hold back the truth we feel alone and separated.
- Telling the truth increases our ability to be happy. Withholding the truth can cause numbness, apathy, anger and sadness.
- When we tell the truth we become trustworthy. When we hold back the truth people don’t trust us. All relationships are built on trust.
- When you tell the truth it becomes easier to reach your goals. When you withhold the truth reaching your goals is a lot harder.
- When you tell the truth you attract people who also tell the truth. When you hold back the truth you attract needy people that drain you.
The biggest consequence to telling a lie is, it leads you to telling another one. We tell lies when we are afraid….afraid of what we don’t know, afraid of what others will think, afraid of what will be found out about us. But every time we tell a lie, the thing that we fear grows stronger…….Fashoyin Damilola
